It's a Mental Game

  Every couple of years or so, I join a free dating website. I’m one of those annoying bitches that serious internet daters hate- I go on for a few weeks, don’t reply to anyone who doesn’t fit my impossible criteria and then delete my account soon...

The 11 Features of a Perfect Woman

  As lots of men like cars and women, I thought I’d combine the two to make up the ‘Ideal Woman’. It’s meant to be humour, so if you’re offended....meh.     The 11 Features of a Perfect Woman   1) Inflatable Mammary Glands- choose a...

Killing Bill Murray

  The month of May tends to be a difficult one for me. Emotions get riled by certain dates and I find it my most psychologically bi-polar month. Sunny mornings and the rising temperatures lift my mood for the most part of the day, but the evenings...

Wrinkles and Rodgering

  There’s a saying “Life begins at 40” that I thought was bollocks. All life begins with a push, from vaginal muscles or a critical inner scribe, and the date on a birth certificate should make no difference. It happens when there’s enough oomph....

Just Say No!

  In a small town, bumping in to old ghosts is inevitable and I’m not someone who likes to contact the dead. I only have to go on a trip to the local shopping centre to see someone I would rather avoid from my past. And as a girl who got around a...